DEAR DIARY: WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME

Oh, to be a free modern woman living my life the way I want to.

I go where I want to go and I do what I want to do.

And... I am in control of my sexuality.

Still, bad things happen to the care free when bars, men and alcohol mix together.

Throw in a doctor with a warped sense of humor...

And you get me asking -- Dear Diary: Why Didn't You Warn Me?

ALN

DEAR DIARY: WHY DIDN'T YOU WARN ME

(Grand Rapids, Michigan)

Today, Dr. Mann said to me, 'Alison, I need to come right out and give you the results of your tests.

'As I warned you, I did not like the preliminary results last week... and now, I have proof positive.'

She looked me dead in my eyes and said, 'You don't have cancer, you are 3 months pregnant... congratulations!'

I was shocked, Dear Diary... now I have to flip back through your now dark pages to see who in the hell I've brought home from my bar hopping!

ALN

THE LAST OF THE BLOODLINE (AN EXCERPT)

The conclusion was make a long time ago,

All of your kind have obviously perished.

You are the only one left to continue this hellish existence.

What a burden it is to be... The Last Of The Bloodline!

DOK

THE LAST OF THE BLOODLINE  (AN EXCERPT)

(Trenton, New Jersey)

...For all he knows, 223 year old Igor Racar is the last surviving pureblood member of his original bloodline.

For centuries, his kind has been hunted, burned alive, impaled with wooden stakes through the heart...

And poisoned with silver... and intentionally bound by garlic rope and left to incinerate in the sun.

 He cannot feel another of his kind's aura any longer... meaning, you simply cannot live forever in abject loneliness!...

DOK

WHEN YOU SLEEP WITH A STRANGER

In the bar hopping scene, one night stands are still a norm.

Cigarette smoke, thumping music, alcohol and desire can lead to bad choices.

Here is an example of what can happen... When You Sleep With A Stranger!

ASL

WHEN YOU SLEEP WITH A STRANGER

(Las Vegas, Nevada)

Marion Hall awoke in a panic because he was covered in a thick, metallic smelling, red substance.

His one night stand was gone, his clothing was gone and he feared the stinging pain in his left side.

It was immediately obvious to him what happened during the night... she drugged him and stole his kidney!

The jagged wound was bleeding out all over the bed...what the hell... momma always said that one day his womanizing would catch up to him!

ASL

GRANDPA STILL HAS HIS SHARP WOODEN STAKES

In one of the dark corners of the basement,

Grandpa Al Landers has just removed the bottom bricks in the wall.

And there,

Hidden in the secret recess,

Is the leather bound storage case.

He opened the clasp on the top and began to take out the contents.

Oh yea, Grandpa Still Has His Sharp Wooden Stakes!

SMA

GRANDPA STILL HAS HIS SHARP WOODEN STAKES

(Lincoln, Nebraska)

Al Landers is now old, gray haired and broken down... and still filled with plenty enough energy.

That energy raised his kids to adulthood, to college and out of the house... and now he has plenty of free time.

Before the kids, before his wife forced him to give up vampire hunting for domestication, he led a dangerous life.

Al Landers is now old, gray haired and broken down... and he can't wait to get back out there and... hunt down and kill more vampires!

SMA

PUPPY LOVE

What greater love for one person to another, there be?
When the night in the bedroom is dark,
And the bad things emerge from nowhere,
That person will be ever glad for... Puppy Love!

ASH

PUPPY LOVE  (AN EXCERPT)

(Salina, Kansas)

...Could any human being really know what's going on inside the mind of her new puppy?

Amethyst Harlowe doesn't know... as her new Cavalier King Charles puppy looks into her eyes.
The puppy knows... and it sees deep into the soul of the new human who is its new companion.
It now knows her special pain... and the nights will forever belong to it as it protects Amethyst from the dark demons in her life!...

ASH

WINTER THUNDER

The house just rocked again.

Thunder is rattling the walls and lightning is scaring the dogs.

It is the middle of winter...

And that isn't snow battering the siding of the house.

What is with this... Winter Thunder?

RLJ

WINTER THUNDER

(Leesburg, Virginia)

A constant in tales of horror and terror is the raging thunderstorm with cringe making lightning.

The expectation is the ominous weather has come with the horror... in the appropriate season.

But today is February 24th... and what in the hell just fired up a lightning filled thunderstorm here in Northern Virginia!

Something scary is coming this way... and not even the supernatural can fight the weather of a planet that is as sick as a dog!

RLJ

CHIGGER BITE NIGHTMARES

Fourth Line Of Horror Tale # 629... and still counting!


***

Not too many things on earth itches as badly as a Chigger bite.

The sensation is so intense that some people draw blood scratching...

For days and days and days!

What makes a Chigger bite so crazy is...

Rarely does one get just a single bite from a single arachnid.

And, the goddamn creatures have a radar sense for the pubic area.

Oh my god... and the remedies for the itching!

Just ask Maggie Gore about her... Chigger Bite Nightmares! 

MSG

CHIGGER BITE NIGHTMARES

(Southport, North Carolina)

Maggie Gore still has night sweat nightmares about her childhood life on coastal North Carolina.

52 years ago, she spent her days playing in the woods with her brothers... and then nighttime came.

Her mother, as a nightly ritual, took alcohol and a safety pin and dug the Chigger heads out of the Chigger bites.

But now she knows Chiggers bite, not burrow, as she looks at her scarred legs before she goes to bed again to greet the nightmares anew.

MSG

  

WHAT FUTURE BE OF THEE, OH X-FILES

Oh my,

It is Monday night again!

Five weeks of six weeks have passed and after tonight,

I will have to ask myself...

What Future Be Of Thee, Oh X-Files!

RLJ

WHAT FUTURE BE OF THEE, OH X-FILES

(Herndon, Virginia)

How fast can six weeks of TV horror pass by as this world continues to spin on its sturdy axis?

As fast as today is the last day of six episodes of the horror love of my existence... the X-Files!

Six episodes of the characters and the horror and the science fiction that I love the most is not enough!

And tonight, in two hours, it will be over... leaving me with even more resolve to create my own horror tales to excite the "believers!"

RLJ 

THE MOST HORRIFYING ANIMAL IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE

What do you fear?

What is it that frightens you the most?

You really should have only one answer to that question?

And it is in your mirror if you hold it to your face!

RLJ

THE MOST HORRIFYING ANIMAL IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE

(Planet Earth)

...The most frail animal in the known universe is the most horrifying animal in the known universe!

How is it that beings with the highest superior intelligence can be felled by a single piece of a virus?

Yet, they continue raze and burn and pillage their planet in their delusional arrogant state of invincibility!

Those assessment are some of the reasons why they will always be alone, one step from self-destruction, right there in the center of the horror universe!

RLJ

THE HOMICIDAL DEAD (23)

The dead walk the earth as homicidal cannibals who eat the living!

The living have mostly been murdered and consumed.

I, Jason Allen Cranston, am alive.

My mission in life,

Before I am eventually cornered and bitten,

Is to find somebody else alive... anybody!

JAC

----------------------------------------------------------------------

This cigarette lighter in my right hand is power in the zombie apocalypse!
Fire is the great equalizer for one against brain rotted millions.
Today is still young.
Let the burning begin!

JAC

THE HOMICIDAL DEAD  (23)

(Richmond, Virginia)


Where would I be without the ability to make fires in a simple way?
Fire gives me the heat of life when the electricity cycles down for a few days.
Fire is the ultimate weapon against the undead... thank god they burn like old funky rubber tires.
And oh, the burn... walking blindly as their eyes burst... providing me with extra heat... and a whole lot of needed entertainment!

JAC

HOW DO YOU SPELL RELIEF

At the end of the week,

When your feet hurt from too much work,

And your psyche is punch drunk from too much media,

How Do You Spell Relief?

RLJ

HOW DO YOU SPELL RELIEF

(Herndon, Virginia)

Well, American horror world dwellers... another week has passed us by more quickly than the last one!

Oh, it was a bloody one, wasn't it... with cat claws politics and itchy sports nagging and more icon deaths?

Though the moon is still high and the sun is still higher... don't some of you feel like Icarus too close to the sky?

My relief is composing horror tales for you to ponder... sometimes pondering reality more horrible than any fiction I can create, while wondering, "What about you?"

RLJ

DEATH HAS MADE A PIT STOP

You die when you die!

Or, at least some people believe so.

But when death appears to have settled in your town,

And it is on a rampage,

Some might believe that... Death Has Made A Pit Stop!

RLJ

DEATH HAS MADE A PIT STOP

(San Antonio, New Mexico)

Tonight, near midnight, 57 year old Mark Jones scribed these few profound words in his bedside journal:

Addy Lu died two weeks ago at 56 years old... Martin Callas died last week at 58 years old!

Louis died four days ago at 62 years old... and Lex Mann died last night at 53 years old!

The spectre of death has murdered all my friends in two weeks... am I to be its next victim on my 58th birthday in two minutes?

MSJ

A SUICIDE UNDER THE SILVER FULL MOON

A tortured life knows no more heartache than one who becomes the wolf.

Living in fear of the horrid full moon is soul crushing.

Tonight, the change begins anew!

And with it comes mortified depression!

But tonight will be a different experience.

Tonight, 

With a weapon and hand crafted bullets,

The full moon will witness... A Suicide Under The Silver Full Moon!

WLL

A SUICIDE UNDER THE SILVER FULL MOON

(Leesburg, Virginia)

On a hill, far away in the distance, where its peak touches the sky... something bad just happened!

A gunshot just exploded in the full moon lit night and something once alive just fell down dead!

The observer, a man out on a late night beer walk, thought an animal up on its hind legs was felled.

He made his way to the hill, to discover a naked man with a bullet wound to his temple from a still warm handgun... with silver bullets!

WLL

WHERE BRAIN CELLS RETIRE TO DIE

All monsters are not creatures, surreal, from nightmares had!

The worst monsters, the most globally horrific, are human!

And often times their destructive ways are consigned... 

By the ignorant voters who gave them their power in the first place!

I give you South Carolina...

The place Where Brain Cells Retire To Die!

RLJ

WHERE BRAIN CELLS RETIRE TO DIE

(Sumter, South Carolina)

...I closed my eyes and I wished to be in paradise... willing myself there... but, this is a horror world!

I opened my eyes and I discovered I was in South Carolina... Sumter, S.C. -- oh, the horror there!

In S.C. where white declares it is superior to black, death to gays and the "N" word is not pronounced "N"!

S.C. where the northern devil is embraced... and and the angst ends when the Confederate flag flies high over the state again!...

RLJ

THE EARTH BECOMES THE OVEN

The atomic bombs fell from the sky centuries ago.
And today, like yesterday, people like me...
Born hundreds of years after the death of the planet...
We feel the pain of radioactive degradation every day.
They are angry, disillusioned, feral and hungry!
One of the final result is...
The Earth Becomes The Oven!

EDD

THE EARTH BECOMES THE OVEN

(What was once called Flagstaff, Arizona)

What is that meat they're cooking in that underground oven those guys over there have dug into the hard clay?

It smells sweet and odd, like nothing I've smelled before... is it an unirradiated animal they captured?

Oh wait a minute... let me adjust my binoculars... they're lifting the meat out of the smoldering hole and they're unwrapping it now.

Holy shit... that is a female human body wrapped in those leaves... food for these hungry feral men in this post apocalyptic hell called earth!

EDD

IT'S NOT FUNNY NOW

In horror, jokes can be made.

But, you better know when to be appropriate!

Or, somebody will end up ironically declaring...

It's Not funny now!

RLJ

IT'S NOT FUNNY NOW

(Boston, Massachusetts) 

I have heard people joke and smoke about what it means to live in The Horrorwalker World!

Some of them joke that vampires suck and werewolves bite and zombies smell like garbage!

Oh, you can be disrespectful of things stronger than you, hungrier than you and deadlier than you!

But where will the jokes and the smokes be when you're cornered by one of them in a dark back alley?

RLJ

THE HOMICIDAL DEAD (22)

The dead walk the earth as homicidal cannibals who eat the living!

The living have mostly been murdered and consumed.

I, Jason Allen Cranston, am alive.

My mission in life,

Before I am eventually cornered and bitten,

Is to find somebody else alive... anybody!

JAC

----------------------------------------------------------------------

As I've written before...
In the suffocating throes of a bitter cold winter,
Snow and zombies are completely incompatible.
It is so much easier to kill the undead when they are frozen!
And here I go again!

JAC

THE HOMICIDAL DEAD  (22)

(Richmond, Virginia)


Oh my god, this has got to be the coldest last few days of a winter I've ever experienced!
I'm freezing my balls off when I go outside to make my beer and food runs... but, oh the caveat!
The zombies are still frozen solid... like cold plastic statues with eyes that move to follow my movements.
Oh, the beautiful sound of hundreds of heads separating from cold dead necks as my machete culls the soon to be thawed herds.

JAC

GODS AND MONSTERS

If you believe in werewolves...

If you believe in vampires...

If you believe in zombies...

If you believe in religions

Then, you believe in Gods And Monster!

WWM

GODS AND MONSTERS

(Gary, Indiana)

They are the scary tales told by horror whisperers to keep thoughts of the supernatural in our minds.

Sometimes all that ignorant silly talk of a God and his fiery hell numbs the mind as boredom sets in.

But tales of vampires, werewolves, zombies and creatures... now that is the stuff of good nightmares.

And as you fall asleep tonight, remember this... where was God when the monster jumped through your bedroom window and devoured your soul!

WMM

STRONG BONDS

Friends to the end of life share...

Strong Bonds!

RLJ

STRONG BONDS

(Mastic Beach, New York)

The bond between Marla Janzen and Pita Sellers was stronger than the grave could contain.

Marla always told her husband, Ron... the one who died first will surely return for her friend in a week.

Well Pita died in her sleep one week ago tonight, and a disbelieving Ron could not wait for tonight to end... for Marla's sake.

Ron dozed-off, to awaken to a cold chill in the bedroom and a knock knock knock on the front door... at 11:58 PM... and to a huge smile on Marla's face!

RSJ

MAKING MY PEACE BEFORE TOMORROW STRIKES ME DOWN

Tonight, I go to sleep one final time.

I am relaxed and in a very peaceful zone.

I should be, because I have spent the last week...

Making My Peace Before Tomorrow Strikes Me Down!

MAB

MAKING MY PEACE BEFORE TOMORROW STRIKES ME DOWN

(Austin, Texas)

I am Mary Anne Ballard, I am psychic and I have dreamed about the day of my death since I was 4 years old.

Tomorrow is the day my dreams and nightmares have forecast the massive heart attack that will take me out.

I has battled to eat right all of my life... exercised to my excellent health... never had a drink of alcohol or had a smoke.

The cholesterol is a little high, but what are you going to do about that... on the day before the day you die?

MAB 

DEEP IN THE JUNGLE WHERE THEY DID NOT BELONG

Professor Peter Rockland lies in a New York City Hospital... sick as a dog.

He definitely contracted something deadly during his recent expedition into the Brazilian Rainforest.

Along with his eight man crew, the are all deathly ill.

Did they contract something dangerous from...

Deep In The Jungle Where They Did Not Belong?

RLJ

DEEP IN THE JUNGLE WHERE THEY DID NOT BELONG

(Urucu, Brazil)

That thing right there, it sitting on the back of that animal, feeding on its blood, is death itself!

It is an unknown species of Anopheles mosquito... and it has a belly full of an unknown deadly virus!

It exists in its ever shrinking ecosystem... feeding... breeding... spreading disease among resistant animals!

But now, bold white men of science encroach... to unknowingly become infected... to then unleash another monstrous virus into the public upon their triumphant return to the USA!

RLJ

X-FILES PERFECTION

I sat transfixed, again, as I watched my favorite TV show ever!

The directing is perfection... the acting is superb... the writing is clever!

And I almost cried tonight when Scully cried...

How sad was it when her mother died!

When the X-Files is again off the air, I will forget it... never!

RLJ

X-FILES PERFECTION

(Herndon, Virginia)

The world of horror fiction is aligned on the correct axis when X marks the perfect spot.

The files that contain all the tropes and all the stories and all the scenarios spill their secrets.

The two protagonists, they who truly love each other, are on a different plane of understanding, now.

How many years have passed since season 9 ended... and how can it be that the X-Files is better now than it ever was?

RLJ

TEXAS RED CLAY (AN EXCERPT)

Texas clay,

As red and iron filled as fresh blood!

After I have feasted from the pulsing neck of my victim...

I rub my face in feral dirt!

Oh, how I love my... Texas Red Clay!

ALM

TEXAS RED CLAY  (AN EXCERPT)

(Gruene, Texas)

...There I was... wet, confused and hungry. I was back from the dead and did not have one idea as to where I was. I knew one thing, though, I needed to satisfy that hunger. Soon instinct took over my mind and body. I soon found myself attacking deer, wild boar and even the occasional small bear for their blood. This way of life continued for about forty days. I constantly found myself thinking, 'Where are the humans for me to feed upon?'

ALM

THE WHISPERERS STILL WHISPERS

The voices in our heads!

Sounds and suggestions from the Whisperers.

The voices can drive some people sad.

The voices can drive some people mad.

The voices can drive some people to murder.

Always remember... The Whisperers Still Whispers!

RLJ

THE WHISPERERS STILL WHISPERS

(Napa State Hospital, Napa, California)

Kimberly hasn't heard the Whisperer since the doctors first forced fed her Haloperidol!

That was 12 years ago when she was 32 years old and had already murdered 11 men!

Tonight, on her birthday, the Whisperer came back... forcing itself up and through the drug blockade!

She is so happy it is back because it tells her what to do... and tonight it told her to kill her nurse, steal her keys and escape because there are many more men to murder!

RLJ

IN THE TIMES OF THE STIR CRAZY (AN EXCERPT)

What in the hell happened in the house across the street during the snowstorm?

Trapped inside for several days,

The owner must have gone nuts...

In The Times Of The Stair Crazy.

ALD

IN THE TIMES OF THE STIR CRAZY  (AN EXCERPT)

(Waterbury, Vermont)

...The four feet of snow, fallen and drifted, trapped Mary Gifford inside of her house for three days.

On the fourth day, as a warming clear sky allowed the sun to begin the melting process, she emerged.

Bob Jones, her across the street neighbor, had already dug out her short driveway for her... what a guy.

He waved at her, then stopped in his tracks in horror, as little Mary, covered in blood, was backing out her front door... dragging a very bloody dead animal behind her!...

ALD

SURPRISE

Wanda has a secret.

God help anyone she reveals it to.

Herbet Blatt has a secret, too... he is a serial murdering vampire.

And when he eventually gets around to attacking Wanda...

Much to his horror -- Surprise!

RLJ

SURPRISE

(Harlem, New York City)

...What do you mean, "I didn't expect you to be a vampire killer!"

Get with it man... in the new millennium, women standing alone on a street corner, in the dark, might be dangerous!

But, as you now know, I'm not the victim you get to terrorize as you rip her throat from her neck!

To the contrary, how exquisite is the pain in your broken wrist... as I bite deep into your neck and suck out what is left of your soul?

WKS

UNJUSTIFIABLE VIOLENCE

You horrible, horrible man!
How in the hell do you think you can keep getting away with this...
Unjustifiable Violence?

RSL

UNJUSTIFIABLE VIOLENCE

(Santa Cruz, California)

In America, these words are constantly repeated... nobody is above the law!

But, you commit a horribly demonic crime and your collar is white... who can touch you?

You own fuck-you money, and you have a Senator in your pocket, why not "murder a bitch!"

And in the end, as you push another strangled body into the Atlantic Ocean... you bask orgasmically in your Unjustifiable Violence

RSL

IF ONLY I HAD MORE TIME

Dilbert Loman is just another old man painfully dying in a hospital bed.

He realizes his long term stay here is soon to end.

He knows his end time is near, because... a monster floats above him.

What is he thinking as is time runs out?

He forms the words on his twisted lips... If Only I Had More Time.

DLL

IF ONLY I HAD MORE TIME

(Ames, Iowa)

Death is no more attracted to a man than when he is old and broken down and on his last leg.

Oh yea, Death hovers over you like a butterfly gliding over a sun ripened flower... wanting its sweet nectar.

When you are young, you can't see death like I do... because age and pain hasn't broken you down, yet.

Oh shit,  if only I had more time to talk to you... it just materialized its scythe... and... I wonder if this is going to hurt?

DLL

SLEEPY TIME AHEAD

The process to falling to sleep is as varied as every human alive.

My sleeping habits are not your sleeping habits.

You sleep in a soft bed.

I sleep in a feral wooden coffin.

And, we all look forward to... Sleepy Times Ahead!

RLJ

SLEEPY TIME AHEAD

(Herndon, Virginia)

When I first lay my head down upon my native soil, my mind immediately begins to battle sleep.

And then, a short time passed, I drift off to the short pre-dream that primes my mind for the night.

The dream is a bizarre mental cinema... a blast of the weird... of which I always remember.

And then I awaken, to fall asleep again, to rest my body and mind before tomorrow's world of horror begins... anew!

RLJ